Should Sexual Orientation Exist?

 Should Sexual Orientation Exist?


Lesbians, faggots, bisexuals, gays, fence jumpers, straight, straight & narrow, open minded, close minded, and bi-curious are among the many terms describing the general population’s sexual orientations. Is there an ultimate goal in the same sexes or opposite sexes lifestyle? Is it purely sex or are we missing the big picture?

Many of the women interviewed have been married at least once to a male, mostly due to society pressure. What is society pressure? Pressure to be with a male, because one wanted to be a “good daughter”, expected to marry and have offsprings. Many girls grow up with parents that encourage them to learn the basics such as cleaning, cooking, laundry, and being lady-like. These girls have barbies, doll house which almost always contains a nursery. It is often thought that a girl will grow up to be a woman that will seek for Mr. Right, get married, buy a house, and have children. The so called perfect fairy tale that consists of a big white house with children playing ring around the rosie, woman cooking in the kitchen and a man sitting on a lazy-o-boy chair watching a sport game.

A woman in her 30’s expresses her gratefulness for having her children, although not wanting a relationship with a man. She admits to using men just to procreate. She was more drawn to women and wanted the “lesbian” life. Once she had gotten pregnant with her 4th child, she was forced to marry the father. Her mother and the father’s parents demanded a marriage so that the child would not be born out of wedlock. Bride was 3 month pregnant, uncomfortable in her dress waiting for the pastor to show up at her future in law’s farm house while the groom was nowhere to be found, suspected of smoking some marijuana and drowning a case of beer. This marriage only lasted for 8 years as it was not a relationship desired by either spouse. The mother of 5 children continued to be with males for few more years, thinking that no woman would want her. After the last relationship with a male that ended with domestic violence, she decided to remain single and gave up the idea of being in love with the right person. She came across a mutual friend that suggested a woman that would be perfect. After nearly 2 years, they are still together. “She is everything I wanted in a person and loves every single one of my children as they were her own.” She beams with happiness.

Another woman with two grown sons is considering going out on a date with her old middle school sweetheart which is a male. She had a rough childhood but played with girly toys, did fairly well in school and joined the army as soon as she graduated. Wanting to be a good daughter for her parents, especially her father, she married a man that she dated for a long period of time. She had two sons out of the marriage and the marriage was dissolved. “I was miserable the whole time other than having my boys” she recalled. She had a strong urge to be with a female, strong enough for the divorce to happen. She spent the next 20 years with women, few were good and few were abusive. “Women can be just as abusive as men, who would have thought it? Women being jerks!” she exclaimed. She just wants to grow old with the perfect person. She has the same requirement/list of must have qualities, regardless of the person’s sex “It’s just sex organs that are different”.

Driving semi trucks for a living, the female truck driver is engaged to a male who happens to be her co-driver. She had the perfect childhood, the perfect life with a man she married soon after she became an adult. “He and I were best friends and we did everything together.” she said. She also made fun of the homosexuals and hated them until her husband brought home a female for their “try everything once” experience. They had a three some, and she became curious about the sexual aspect of woman on woman intercourse. She invited a female friend over for their private sessions, “it was just sex” she insisted. The marriage ended in a divorce, as she decided to move on with another male eventually marrying him. “I didn’t know what I was doing, I was in my mid 20’s and I wanted everything right now and then. I was pretty immature bitch” she sighed. It was not until she met a female butch lesbian, that she fell in love with and changed her life. She and her lesbian lover had a typical relationship, living together, paying the bills, working toward to common goals, have the typical argument and looking forward to the future together. They spent 8 years before splitting up over her lesbian lover’s usage of illegal drugs. She later came across another butch lesbian that she fell madly in love with, however; their relationship was on and off for several years before the butch lesbian decided to finally move on without her. “She ripped my heart out and stomped on it and spat on it. I will never love another woman like that ever again!” she screamed. Few months later, she met her current fiancée. She admits she miss the company of a woman, the softness of the skin, and the compassionate they shared. “Men can just be wholesome stupid, and so emotionally detached. But they do make me feel good time to time so I’m okay with that.” she confided.

The women aren’t going back to men because of failure of the same sex relationship. They’re simply looking for the right person, regardless of the sex of the person. Relationship is based on attraction and chemistry shared between two people; the understanding of what each other wants, and the similar goals they desire out of life itself. The emotions, thoughts, actions and situations are all the same in relationships; it just depends if the persons are right for each other. Some may be lucky to find the right person sooner than later and have a long journey into golden years. Some may have to wait a little bit longer.